Got a real obsession with Adele at the moment, and she looks absolutely gorgeous in this picture, and I really would love her hair! I can't stop singing Someone Like You, literally over and over again, its magggical. Such a sad song, but it actually makes me so happy when I sing it, it's my shower song. Literally sing it over and over again in the shower, and it's sounding pretty good if I do say so myself. I may have to record it hmmmm

Why?

I'm in a mega weird mood tonight. School was ok, until French and Dutton was being a nob and me and Ottie had too keep shouting at him. And then i kept singing out loud which was really quite embarrassing, French put me in a shittttt mood. So, came home and went straight to Han's after school and we just chilled and watched Being Human which was disgusting!! But then we made a list of everything that we had to achieve by the time we went home, which was do art, do English, do geography, sort out London, and sort out Yorkshire (<3). We talked about London for ages, and then Brid came home and we booked the tickets yay, and she gave us a little fashion show of all the new clothes she had brought. Han slipped in the fact that we needed to sort out Yorkshire, and then we planned it all meaning we don't have to pay to get the train and yay. This left me in a really good mood, and i'm so so excited to go up and see everybody, halfterms gonna' be awesome. ...But then went to singing, and I was being really annoying for some reason but I didn't mean to be. So now i'm back home. Sat on my bed. Watching glee. And thinking about loads of stuff. Thinking about why everything seems to go wrong, why nothing particularly great ever seems to happen to me, why I haven't got a boyfriend, why things go so well one minute and then shit the next, why people talk to you and make you feel amazing about yourself and everything and then suddenly just don't really talk to you any more, why I never seem to know what the hell is going on, why I always feel so shit about myself, why I can't do anythingggg right and just why really. The thing is I haven't got a fucking clue why I feel like that, I don't want to feel like that at all, I wish I was incredibly happy like everyone else with a perfect life, perfect relationship, perfect everything. But not everything can go how you want too I guess. It must be this time of year, that just makes you feeel so crap, and I really do hope it picks itself up and improves cause I don't like this weird mood. Glad everyone else is so happy though. Oh and p.s my brother is a complete arsehole.

your never too old for playdough

Samuel Hind

Being in Sussex with my wonderful family is just purely wonderful everytime. It takes 3 hours to get here, but car journeys are just nommm when its dark and abit rainy and you have an ipod the whole journey. So i've been here for about 2  and abit hours so far, staying with my auntie char, uncle matt, cousins isaac whos 10, grace whos 7, sam whos 5 and nat whos nearly 2. They are all amazing. But Sam is the funniest little thing alive, he's adorable, has bright orange hair and has the biggest lisp ever. And is surprisingly humorous for a 5 year old. Me and him went upstairs and just laid on his bed so he could go to sleep and i tickled his back, and in the space of half an hour he came out with the best things...

- I will scream to death if you tickle my knees, in a minute I will blow the house down hett, I can promise that!

- Can you be a Victorian child for a minute so I can whip you?

-I have a Verruca on my foot and dad's going to bite it off me and chuck it away

- Sam: Do you have a boyfriend hett? Hettie: No sam I don't, do you have a girlfriend? Sam: No I do not, I want to live in a house on my own for the peace and quiet. But I might have friends round sometimes.

- 0 o'clock is really early isn't it, and 100 o'clock is more than 11 o'clock

- Can you see this big giant hole in my trousers? Well guess what, I took off my trousers and bit the hole in my bum so people could see my willy, but shh, don't tell mum.

- Hett stop it right now or I will be sick directly on you

- Grace, stop being a chav!! You...you...you...COMB OVER!

So I'm positive there shall be many more Sam Sayings over this weekend. Cute kid. He cracks me up a treat.

today was pretty shit if i'm honest, just in a general bad mood as of what i last blogged about. but then i came home and went to the gym to chill, but it wasn't chilling at all, this really hot guy thats a personal trainer kinda thing at the gym came to see my for a bit, and made me do all this shit, and was being seriously annoying. and he kept calling me the 'whiney girl' grr, so i just told him to piss off and he laughed at me. but hes so hot ooft. but he made me in a worse mood. and he kept drawing on me. grr. then when we'd finished he goes 'you have really pretty eyes' and then just walked off. was mega weird. but rather nice. then i went to see han and we ate pesto pasta and watched forest gump, which was fantassstic cause we've been planning to watch it for ages and have never got round too it. she got it me for christmas lovely thing. officially one of my fave films, love love love. haven't finished it yet cause i had to go to dance. but yeah. anyway, that cheered me up, and then came home and some people are just so lovely, like when you talk to them just makes you instantly happy. and now im about to go and pack to go up to sussex at the weekend to see my family, and go to a christening. so crazy weekend. and i dont know what to wear to the christening, hmm. dress or skirt and blouse. decisions decisions.

hmm

so it's that time of year again where i go all depressed and sad for ages. it's a month and a bit til my baby brothers birthday. he died, and would be 7 this year. his name was ben. and even though it's been seven whole years, it seems like it was only yesterday really. and it makes me want to cry in huge amounts, but i hate crying infront of my family, cause then they all get really upset and they cry too. and then everyone is sad, and theres no way of getting out of feeling shit. so i don't really have anyone to talk to about it or anything. and so blogging seems to be the only way really. i found this bag with loads of things in of ben's like, his baby handprints and footprints, and pictures of us holding him, and 'sympathy cards' which just make you cry 20 times more than you already are. X

hi paolo